Forsaking All Others Page 3
Devon shook his head. Surely, he’d spoiled her too much. He’d foolishly given her too much of his time and of course, she now wanted more. Women always wanted more.
It’s like I’m going to have to remind Julianna that this is not how a woman should behave.
Devon gripped the steering wheel and set his jaw in a determined line. After two years of marriage, having a child would be a good move. A solid one. However, sex with Julianna was no longer appealing. She was boring and didn’t even carry herself in a manner that would cause him to want her.
That fact didn’t render having a child impossible. It would just take work. She had to try harder to keep his attention. He had to make that clear to her.
He chuckled, thinking about how she would initially react to that statement. Surely, she would yell and most definitely cry. Julianna always cried. One part of him hated it while the other part of him was empowered by her display of weakness. If she would only do more to keep his attention, this wouldn’t happen. He was an attractive man and had plenty of offers.
Devon smiled, smug as he caught a glimpse of himself in the rearview mirror. He took his time admiring his smooth brown skin and angled features. Smart, handsome, and successful. He could have his pick of women. Julianna always seemed to forget that. Who didn’t seem to forget were the women at work. They admired him for the man he was, and they weren’t afraid to give praise where it was due.
That was another area where Julianna lacked. She never praised him. She only knew how to find fault in everything he did. It was high time they had a serious talk. She wasn’t acting like a wife.
When he married her, Devon had been serious about their vows, about her forsaking all others, submitting completely to him. Julianna needed to realize that, in order for them to get there, there was a lot of growing up she needed to do.
Still.
7
The air in their large bedroom was crisp and cool, the pale-yellow curtains billowing in the gentle breeze that was provided from the central air conditioner. Julianna stared up at the ceiling, admiring the decorative exposed wooden beams from her spot on the chaise. Ever since their argument, Devon had been even more distant, even disdainful, toward her. To make matters worse, he’d chastised her and tried to lecture her on her “childish” ways, told her that wasn’t how a “good wife” acted.
She scoffed, the sound harsh and hollow as it echoed in the empty space.
Well, he’s not exactly husband of the year, either.
She was sick of it. Her head pounded, and she rubbed her temples, hoping that another migraine wouldn’t start. She tried her best, but deep in her heart she knew things would have to change if her marriage was going to work.
But Devon saw none of his own wrongdoings. He was callous, emotionally detached, and seemed like he enjoyed hurting her. She realized he only viewed her as the problem.
Julianna sighed and sat up, her head still pounding. As much as she didn’t want to admit, it was probably high time for her and Devon to spend time apart.
I’m sure he’d enjoy that.
Something pulled her from her thoughts as Devon came into the bedroom. He was deliberately silent as she spoke to him.
“Devon, I need to tell you something.” When he didn’t answer, she heaved a sigh, got up, and stood in front of him. “I think we need some space.”
The silence in the room was deafening.
Devon stood there, a quizzical expression over his face. “You’re trying to leave me?”
Julianna slowly shook her head. “No, baby, I said we need some time apar—”
“—what the fuck makes you think you have the right to leave me?” Devon’s voice was low and menacing as he took a step closer. “I thought I had made myself clear earlier, but either you’re just dense or deliberately trying to create more issues. Either way, you need to stop it.” He clenched his teeth and squared his jaw. “Now.”
He took another step closer and glared down at her, his hands folded behind his back. Instinct made her step backward. His dark eyes narrowed into slits. “I have worked tirelessly for you, Julianna. Yet, all you ever do is complain.”
The hairs on Julianna’s arms rose and a deep, sickening wave of cold coursed through her body as he continued to close the distance between them, their bodies nearly touching.
“I want the old love we had, Devon. I don’t know who you are anymore,” she little more than whispered as her eyes darted from his down on the floor.
He stilled and cocked his head to the side. An amused expression crossed his face as he tapped his chin. “Is that so?”
Hopeful, Julianna stared up at him. “Yes.” She cleared her throat. “You’re so distant with me. I don’t feel the love anymore.”
“Love?” Devon’s face twisted into a scowl. His frame loomed over hers as he drew in even closer, his body dominating hers. “You really want to talk about love? You’re being childish.”
He stood directly in front of her, his stance defensive, their bodies now touching. Julianna’s pulse quickened.
Before she could respond, Devon grabbed her wrist. “Who’s so much better than me, huh?”
He held fast even as she squirmed against his grip, enjoying himself as he watched her struggle.
“Who?” he barked.
Julianna struggled to free herself with her other hand. “I’m not doing this with you, Devon. Let me go!”
He tightened his grip and brought his face mere inches from hers. “Who? Answer the fucking question, Julianna.”
His voice was low and even as his eyes burned into hers, his gaze menacing. Julianna pushed against his chest in an attempt to make him loosen his grip, but it proved to be futile. Alarmed, she glanced up at him once again, hoping he would note the fear in her eyes.
He noted it and seemed to be fueled by it.
“Devon, please!”
“Just tell me who.”
Julianna clawed at his fingers. Devon had his moments, but never like this. He seemed, this time, like he would truly hurt her.
He stared down at her, amused by her pitiful attempts to get out of his grip.
Is he enjoying this?!
Julianna allowed her arm to go limp, which caused Devon to immediately loosen his grasp, seemingly uninterested when she no longer fought. She backed away, cradling her arm to her chest. He continued to stand there, his large frame unmoving. His eyes, however, followed her every movement.
“I hope you wouldn’t think of leaving me, Julianna. I’d kill you before I let that happen. I promise you.” A slow smile snaked across his lips. He stood there for a few more seconds, savoring the effects his venom had on Julianna, before he turned and walked away. He disappeared down the hall in the direction of the living room without another word.
Julianna didn’t breathe until Devon’s form disappeared. Hot tears rolled down her cheeks and she desperately swiped them, her hands shaking. She had to leave. She fought back the nausea that she felt, and the sour taste of bile that she felt in her throat. The man that she had vowed to love had now threatened to kill her. She wasn’t going to stick around to find out if he truly meant it.
Devon was unstable, and she feared what would happen if she stayed. She feared what would happen if she left. He’d threatened her in the past, but never like this. The man that he’d shown her tonight was not the man she had fallen in love with. She had no idea who this new person was. She wiped her eyes and nodded in answer to her own unspoken questions. She would leave. Even if just temporarily. Devon just couldn’t know when.
8
On autopilot, Julianna nodded as Devon rattled on about work. Ever since that night, she’d waited with bated breath for her chance to leave.
Several weeks had passed. Her happiness withered with each passing day, but she knew she had to remain strong. Devon couldn’t even suspect she wanted to leave him. Every day, she felt as if something inside her was dying with each chaste kiss.
She barely registered Devon spea
king to her as he made his way out the door. Ever since she had brought up needing “space,” he’d done the complete opposite—he would randomly show up at home in the middle of the day with no other reason but to make sure she was still there. Many times, he would find her hard at work preparing orders for her organic skin care business, and even then, he would question her actions. He’d always hated her business but seemed to be put more on edge by her continuing to ship orders and create new recipes for her clients.
You don’t need to work, Julianna. Why the fuck are you working so hard now? Something I don’t know?
She never engaged him; she maintained her silence and continued working until he would become frustrated and give up.
He even made it a point to accompany her to the post office to mail off her customer’s orders. As if he was concerned that she wouldn’t return.
He clung to her at night, his grip unrelenting and possessive, in case she was foolish enough to steal away in the middle of the night. And she’d lain there, wondering just how much more she would have been able to stand.
Even with his newfound possessiveness, he never once tried to discuss their problems. What problems? He had no problems. He acted as if they didn’t exist.
Julianna stood in the doorway and watched Devon get into his car. Today, he hadn’t asked her a million questions about her plans, and today was the first day he hadn’t provided her with some menial “busywork” that would force her to stay home. Today, he seemed distracted, tense. For the first time in a long while, he no longer had her in his crosshairs.
Julianna closed the front door.
I’m leaving today.
Swiftly and silently, Julianna stole through the house, collecting only the most essential items to pack in her bags. Her marriage was falling apart. Nothing would change if something didn’t change. She wasn’t sure where she wanted to take things at that point.
Just as Julianna shoved another pair of jeans into her bag, she heard a car door slam and feeling temporarily left her body. She collected herself and peered outside, her heart racing. She released a breath in a whoosh of air that made her lightheaded. She steadied herself and returned to work. It wasn’t him. She had to move fast.
There was no way anything would improve if she continued to stay there. She loved Devon, but he’d changed. Gone was the loving and thoughtful man she’d fallen in love with so long ago. She wasn’t even sure if that man still even existed. If he’d ever existed.
She closed her eyes and thought about the Devon she knew now.
Cold. Callous. Arrogant. Distant.
Slowly, cautiously, Julianna made one final sweep of the house as she gathered her luggage. Although she was alone, she cringed with every creak of the floorboards, confirming silence before she continued on.
Drenched in sweat, she took an exhausted breath as she entered the garage. She peered under the car and behind the tool station before she yanked her car trunk open. The luggage tumbled into the back. She hopped into the driver’s seat. Frantic fingers fumbled to find the ignition.
She started the car and sent her gaze skyward in a silent prayer as the garage door taunted her with its slow grind toward the roof. Her heart pounded in her chest. Inch by inch, the outside world came into view; her anxiety grew as more and more of the morning light illuminated the garage.
She heaved a final sigh of relief when the door opened. He wasn’t there, waiting.
Without a moment of hesitation, Julianna backed out of her driveway and sped down the street to create as much distance between herself and what was no longer her home. When she’d put what she felt was enough distance between herself and the house, she pulled off the road and shaky hands reached for her phone.
Her heart was pounding out of her chest, but she willed her voice to remain calm as she explained the situation to her sister, Danicah, on the other side of the phone. She needed somewhere to stay, and she didn’t want to be alone. If Devon tried to come for her, then she needed all the help she could get.
9
Devon paused at his front door, his hand resting on the doorknob. When he got in, what would happen? The last thing he wanted was another conversation with his wife.
His shoulders slumped as he thought about that possibility. He couldn’t understand his wife. In the beginning, he’d thought she was, and would be, everything he would ever need, but after some time had passed, she’d gotten comfortable and didn’t know how to be a good wife anymore. She was just…boring.
Take the last few weeks for example. She’d even had the nerve to tell him she wanted to leave him, and then spent the last few weeks being withdrawn and solemn like a petulant child. All he’d ever been was a good husband—provided for her and bought her nice things. And all she ever gave him was misery. He couldn’t understand the reason she chose now of all times to act up. She didn’t get how any of this worked.
He opened the door with a heavy sigh and walked inside. It was cool and bright, but it seemed empty.
He took a quick scan of the kitchen and noticed it was empty. She hadn’t cooked, either. Irritation surged through him as his stomach rumbled. He called out for his wife, not bothering to wait for a reply as he continuously called through his home, his loud voice bouncing off of the walls that now seemed cold and sterile. When he made his way through the house, he realized he was all alone.
Annoyed, he walked back into the master bedroom. Julianna hadn’t told him she would be going out today. Where could she be?
His eyes settled on the open closet door. The clothes were organized, as usual, but something seemed off. Some of her things were missing. He raced over to the closet to confirm his suspicion. Empty hangers stood where some of her clothes had been, and the empty spaces on the racks where some of her shoes used to be stood out, obvious, as if mocking him. He burst into the bathroom in disbelief to confirm what he was seeing. Julianna’s things were missing from there too.
He ran to the guest room to search for one more thing. As he poked his head inside, he looked into the closet. That too was empty. The shelves in the closet were usually lined with various natural nut butters, essential oils, and shipping labels for her pathetic little skincare business. At first, he’d contemplated making her stop—he could more than provide for the two of them, but he’d allowed for her to keep the pocket change she made. It didn’t matter, anyway. It didn’t amount to much. The business proved to be a good hobby for her when she bored him. So, he’d allowed it. But now, the shelves stood empty.
Devon sat down on the bed and placed his head in his hands. His wife had left him.
“Bitch.”
I did nothing to deserve this.
This was a stunt to get him to pay even more attention to her. He couldn’t even understand how much more she could need.
He pulled out his phone and punched in her number. He was sure she was over at that sister of hers, Danicah. Just thinking about her made him angry. That woman never liked him, even though he’d never said a mean word to her. He could only imagine all the things she was filling Julianna’s head with.
He would not let her ruin this for him. Julianna would come back to him now, and he would have to show her what would happen when a woman, a wife tried to leave Devon Winton.
10
Julianna rolled over in bed, irritated by the ringing of her phone. Devon. Again. He’d been relentlessly calling her since the evening he noticed she’d left.
She flung off her covers and grabbed the phone from the night stand, annoyed with Devon’s antics. He really had some nerve to be contacting her this early in the morning.
She answered. “Yes?”
For once, she didn’t hide the anger in her voice as she waited for his reply. However, all that came from the other end of the line was his heavy breathing.
“Devon, what the hell do you want at four in the morning?” Her voice shook at her raised tone, but her anger remained.
“Baby, why did you leave me? I don’t deserve this.�
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He was drunk.
Julianna sighed, swung her legs off the bed and got up. She poked her head of out the bedroom door to make sure her sister was still asleep before she slipped outside for more privacy.
“Devon, you’re drunk. I refuse to talk to you when you’re like this.”
“Just meet with me for a few minutes.”
Julianna heaved another sigh and paced the lawn. The last thing she wanted to do was meet up with Devon. She wasn’t ready to deal with him yet. She needed more time to think things through.
Before she could reply, he spoke again. “I’m right down the street. Just meet with me, baby.”
Julianna’s heart began to hammer in her chest, the rapid beating causing a fluttering sensation to make its way across her chest.
Is he watching me?
She looked around before replying. “How do you know where I am?”
She heard Devon laugh, a low rumble that resonated through the speaker. “You’re at your sister’s. You always go to your sister’s.”
He stopped, and she heard him take a swig of something—more alcohol.
“Really.”
Julianna’s nervous eyes scanned the area around her, then she began to back up toward the house. Keeping her eyes peeled for signs of movement, she opened the front door and slipped back into the house. She made quick but quiet work of bolting all the locks. The thought of Devon being nearby made her sick. The fact he was drunk made her even more uncomfortable. When she was finished, she heaved a relieved sigh and leaned against the front door.
“You don’t know me so well.” She peeked out through the blinds. So far, she didn’t see any cars that looked out of place. The last thing she wanted was for him to show up and make a scene.